Tag: influence

Why Might I Want This?

Break Free Image

I did an exercise to get over what was holding me back from being successful. It involved writing down everything I thought about a particular project, the good and bad. It seemed like there was more bad than good. That gave me insight into how I really felt.

Next I wrote down the emotions that this project brought up. I identified the feeling that were stopping me from moving forward. Feelings are always the reason we don’t do what we think we want. It’s our subconscious’ way of keeping us from violating some internal belief that we might not even be aware of.

After that I wrote down what I was still feeling about it and came to an insight about why I wasn’t doing it.

The next section is probably the most important. That is asking myself and writing down why I might want to do this.

I listed the reasons what I might get from doing this and the feeling that would go with each of these.

The first one I put down was money, and then a variety of other things.

Next I rated each of these from 0 to 10 in the order of how I felt about them. Money ended up at a 2. Being seen as an expert and the perceived status ended up an 8. I wanted to have others see me and my work as useful and important.

That brought up a childhood conflict. I was raised in a family of 7 children. We spent our childhood picking on each other and making fun of each other. I learned not to stand out or tell anyone about my desires and accomplishments because it gave them ammunition for the barrage of teasing and verbal abuse.

That is in direct conflict of what I want now and is hurting my life and success.

Once I discovered this, I can now work on doing away with the conflict and allowing me to put myself out there to succeed.

If you would like to have someone guide you through this process, contact me.

Magic Words

brain circuitry

There are certain magical expressions that will get a person’s immediate attention and will bypass the critical factor to get your message heard. Those words are the other person’s exact words repeated to them.

We go through life looking for our self. Looking for someone who is like us. Someone who will understand us. When we find someone who speaks like us we are willing to work with them and buy from them.

Echoing a person’s exact words signals to that person that they are heard and understood.